The supernatural thing about being honest and truthful with yourself is that it seemingly opens a third eye which allows you to see the honesty and truth in the world. Not only can you peak behind the shit that the world attempts to present as sugar, self-truth opens the door to empathy. When you empathize with people, you spend less time fearing their differences and more time seeking to understand them.
When you take time to assess yourself and can measure your distance from perfection, it becomes almost impossible to judge others. Holding people accountable and judging them are two different things. Don’t confuse the two; One serves you and the other serves goodness.
It took me a long time to get to the point where I could face the reality that I did not have the tools to cope with some of the things that life had thrown at me. It took me another couple of years to realize that prayer was not enough, and another few years to work through some things with a professional. And I’m not referring to a mental illness- getting professional help to work through issues is not always connected to, or results in, the diagnosis of a mental illness. But I had a lot of work to do.
Like love, like joy, like peace, like happiness, like stability, like everything else that is pure and good- when you get a piece of it, you want everyone to experience it. I emerged on the other side of therapy more aware of myself. I became aware of where my mind was in relation to the things around me and it provided me a new angle of confidence in myself.
Today, knowing where I’ve been and where I am, I can clearly see that many of us are not OK. We have to start being honest and talking, but in order for that to happen, we need a safe space to do so. That is the underlying premise of Black Guy DIY. Beneath the filters, and in between the words on social media- there is so much sadness.
The church taught us to shut up and make that shit look good. But we’re not OK. Our families permitted elephants to sit at the holiday dinner table. But we’re not OK. Our pride and ego’s convince us that everything is good. But we’re not OK. After some green, or a bottle, or a good round of sex, we can cope. But we’re not good.
If speaking your truth starts by talking to yourself in the mirror, so be it. It’s impossible to lie to yourself when no one else is around. The point of this short article is to encourage anyone reading it to begin the disclosure-to-self process. You are not alone, and there is progress in truth.